Comment: Crocs (The Rant Moves on to Tivas and Obscenity)

Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Disneyworld is just a place on earth that wishes it were Disneyland but isn't on the right side of the country so they made themselves bigger to compensate.


Yeah Crocs on kids are almost as disturbing as Tevas on kids. Have you ever noticed that Tevas are a family thing? Like you never see one person in a family wearing a pair of Tevas while the rest are in decent shoes. It's always the entire freaking family decked out in those weird, uncomfortably revealing shoes. Like if I wanted to see exactly how many hairs you have on your big toe sir (or sometimes madam, if we're honest), I would have found a way to get you barefooted. I don't want to see that while I'm riding the train though, you know? They're totally a cult thing because even the kids are forced to wear them. Like I bet if you see a pregnant Teva wearer, that fetus has probably got Teva's on.

Maybe Crocs are the modest-man's answer to Tevas. For those who aren't feet exhibitionists, you know? It's still wrong!!!!


And don't get me started on these:

THESE ARE NOT OK. Have you seen these? I saw someone who wore these. I was sitting across the room from him and suddenly saw some wiggling out of the corner of my eye. He was WIGGLING HIS TOES in these. I have never in my life seen something so disturbing. I wanted to cry. I almost did.